Who Do We Want Our Children to Be? - iBlankie - Parental Tips to Raising Happy Kids - Parents Instruction Manual

Who Do We Want Our Children to Be?

Just as the transition to a new school year for children happens each fall, this is a good time for parents to start anew also. Along with buying a new backpack for your child, it is a good time for parents to refresh their goals for the school year.

I recently picked up a Hallmark card with a frazzled woman pictured on the front; the inside of the card read, "Life is so DAILY!" And isn't that true for parenting, from the beginning. There is so much physical and emotional and social and educational caretaking, what with meals, clothes, toys, play dates, childcare, and school, that we are often daunted just by the routine of raising our child. Often we are so immersed in the routines of daily living that we don't have time to focus on clear goals for our child's development. And we really do need those goals to provide touchstones as we move throughout the daily-ness of our lives.

I think that universal goals for a child are threefold:

  • 1. Our child should be caring and nurturing. We want our child to feel good about themselves and to connect with other children and adults in a loving way. We want our child to be empathic and sympathetic and to enjoy being with and helping other people. We want our child to be compassionate and social.

  • 2. Our child should be strong and capable. We want our child to feel empowered to move confidently in the world to do their life work. We want our child to be able to voice their feelings and views and to take action as needed.

  • 3. Our child should be a problem-solver. We want our child to have the most important life skill, the ability to analyze a situation and propose a solution and, should that solution not work, to be able to re-strategize to try again. We want our child to be able to cope with frustration and deal with adversity and creatively resolve conflict and problems, be they social problems, emotional problems, financial problems, ecological problems, personal problems or national or international problems. We want our child to be a creative thinker and solution-seeker.

So, given that we want our child to be caring and strong and a great problem-solver, the question becomes: how can we encourage our child to be nurturing and powerful and analytic? Within each parenting situation we encounter, how can we partner with our child in helping them become more caring, stronger, and more thoughtful? And how can we empower ourselves to empower our child?

iBlankie is about empowering you with words, skills, strategies, and techniques to empower your child to thrive, to become the best that they can be within themselves and within the world.